We Are People by Sam Durham

I believe that you aren't supposed to gawk at women

When I was still doing competitive dance, I performed quite a bit. One day, I had a costume for ballet which had a tutu. As I was walking off stage a man came up to me. He said he liked my costume because it “accentuates my curves” and he “enjoyed watching me perform”. At the time, I didn't think any of it. However, now looking back to it I feel disgusted, horrified, and slightly violated. The man objectified me, possibly others, and I was only a child.

With me being eight I was bewildered. I asked him to explain what he meant as I was confused. He said he liked it because it was tight. That’s disgusting! Who likes a costume simply because it’s tight? I regret not telling anyone besides my coach because who knows who this man has targeted. I hated it, I was uncomfortable and he wouldn't leave until I walked off, scared and confused.

Later that day I had asked my coach (also making her swear not to tell) why the costumes were remarkably tight - the boys costumes were baggy - She said the judges “appreciated” it and it could earn us more points which made me confused. Why are the points for the costume, not the routine. We spent months perfecting the routine, not the costume.

However, because of this I've learned that objectification can happen anywhere, at any age, and at any time. Now, I try and advocate for the awareness of harassment, trying to bring it to an end.

Because I believe that women can teach, win, lose, play, work, and live without feeling scared of getting harassed or taken - solely for how they look.

I believe that women aren't just items

I believe we are people.